


4 Times Nick Didn't Tell Murray the Truth, and One Time That He Did

by catyah



Category: Riptide (TV)
Genre: Spoilers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-05-06
Updated: 2012-05-06
Packaged: 2017-11-04 21:50:19
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,803
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/398558
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/catyah/pseuds/catyah
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Exactly what the title says it is -- see notes for spoiler warnings.</p>
            </blockquote>





	4 Times Nick Didn't Tell Murray the Truth, and One Time That He Did

**Author's Note:**

> A series of five short vigniettes -- spoilers for "Something Fishy", "Boz Busters", "Still Goin' Steady", and "Echoes".

#1 

"Murray, listen. I'm sorry to tell you this, but Jody doesn't love you. At least, not the way you want her to." When Murray looks at him, surprised and hurt, Nick wants to stop, but he's come this far -- besides, Murray deserves to know the truth. He talks quickly, trying to get it over with, like ripping off a bandage. "I'm taking her out to dinner tonight, buddy, that's why she told you she can't go out with you tonight, and I'm sorry, I really am. I want you to know, I'm not interested in her." 

" _Nick_ ," Murray says, and his voice is so full of pain that Nick flinches, but he continues on. 

"I promise you, it wasn't my idea. Jody said that if I didn't go out to dinner with her, she wouldn't give us the information about her co-worker, and then we're not going to get anywhere on the case. Murray?"

Murray glances at Cody, who is nodding his agreement of the facts to Murray, and with a little sidelong nod, his approval of Nick's actions. 

"Okay," Murray says with a sigh as he gets up from the table. He's nearly to the stairs before Nick tells him one more thing. 

"Jody doesn't mean to hurt you, Murray. She still wants to be your friend, if you're okay with that." 

"I'll have to think about that, I guess." 

"What about us, Murray?" Nick asks. "Still friends?" 

Murray actually turns around at that and gives Nick a puzzled look. "Of course we are. Why wouldn't we be? See you later, guys." 

***

That's what Nick is thinking. Instead, he puts his face in his hands as Murray slumps his way down the stairs to his room. 

He's disappointed enough, knowing that Jody has other plans, Nick tells himself. There's no point in hurting him, and what he doesn't know won't hurt him, anyway. It's just one stupid date with this woman. What could happen? 

 

&&&&&&&

#2

"Murray, we need to talk. But I don't want you to say anything, not yet. I want you to hear me out. This isn't easy for me to say. I know Cody and I told you that we're happy for you about this job at Techna-Trend, that it's a great opportunity and all -- But that's not the truth, buddy. It's not going to be the same without you around here. We don't want you to go. Hell, _I_ don't want you to go. So -- don't go. Okay?" 

***

Yeah, that's what he should say, Nick tells himself, lying awake and staring at the ceiling. He's still got a chance. Murray doesn't leave until tomorrow morning, after all. At least he is if Nick doesn't bite the bullet and just _tell_ him. 

But if he tells Murray that, it's not really fair, is it? How can he pressure him to give up this great opportunity? Murray deserves the best. He's _earned_ the best. 

But why can't the best be staying here and working with them? 

I think so, but wouldn't Murray be disappointed to have to say no to Techna Trend? Wouldn't he always regret it? And if he always regrets not going, wouldn't he blame me for wanting him to stay on the Riptide? 

Nick rolls over and decides to sleep on it. If he can get to sleep. 

At least he won't be that far away, Nick thinks as he dozes off. He'll still be available if we need him. It's like Murray said, it's not like he's going to be on the other side of the world. 

 

&&&&&&&

#3 

"Don't get up, Murray. You had your say, now Cody and I get ours, all right? Good. I didn't want you to go to Techna-Trend, but I didn't want to ask you to turn down what you thought was a good opportunity." He pauses to smile at Murray, who is grinning down at the table, a red flush rising from the collar of his robe and pajamas. "Anyway, I just wanted you to know that we're really glad that we got you back, and you're safe and here with us where you belong."

"Aw. Thank you, Nick, I --" 

"I'm not finished. What you said about us being more than friends to you, that we're like brothers? Thank you. That's really -- I mean -- Yeah, well -- same here, Murray. That's how I feel about you and Cody, too." 

"Me too," Cody said. "Now, Murray? How would you like to take a little trip?"

"What, today?" 

***

Nick would like to say that to Murray, but he's never been good at saying that sort of thing, and right now he doubts he could get any words past the Mimi-sized lump in his throat. 

Hoping that Murray will understand, he looks out the salon window trying to clear his throat as he nudges Cody. _You ask him, Cody._

He shouldn't have worried about Murray understanding. Once the Boz sees the plane tickets to New Orleans that he's holding out, his whole face lights up. 

Still, a little part of his brain -- which he quickly silences -- wonders if Murray's face would have been even happier if he'd been able to say the words that were stuck behind that lump in his throat. 

&&&&&&&

#4

"Listen up, Murray. I'm sorry we laughed, really! It's just that these designs for Brenda's solar car -- okay, okay, never mind. Look, I understand that you want to help your friend, but I think you're making a mistake by believing her. Cody and I think that she's just buttering you up to get you to help her, and then she's just going to take off and leave you sitting alone down here, picking up the pieces of your broken heart. I'd hate like hell for you to go through that... again," Nick said, muttering that last word to himself. Cody raises his eyebrows, and he goes on. "You've got to admit, Cody and I are a little more experienced in the ways of the world --"

"Nick! Brenda is --"

"A very nice girl, yeah. Just like she's the homecoming queen and the head cheerleader, Boz. Trust me when I tell you that the people we knew in high school change, and not always for the better. She's been lying to you and we're going to figure out why. Now, get up, you're coming with us." 

"Well -- I don't feel good about this, but I guess it can wait until I prove to you guys that you're wrong about Brenda. Can I at least bring my Brain Busters Big Book of Questions, to study up for the show?" 

***

Cody is about to say just what Nick is thinking, but Nick stops him just in time. It's clear to him that Murray is already stressed enough, between the game show this afternoon and Brenda tugging at his heart -- and possibly other body parts as well. He doesn't need to hear about their suspicions, at least not until they have some proof. 

What the Boz needs right now is to have a shower to relax him and then a couple hours of sleep, Nick thinks to himself. By the time he's done, we'll have the proof we need, and we'll figure out a way to break it to him gently that she doesn't love him. Poor guy. But he'll be fine waiting for us on the Riptide. After all, what could happen? 

&&&&&&&

 

And then --

 

Nick waves at Cody to send him up on deck without him for now, and after a quick wordless exchange -- a questioning raised eyebrow from Cody, a self assured nod in return from Nick, Cody goes. Nick watches him long enough to make sure that he's being careful and is holding the handrail with the hand that's not tucked in a sling, and then turns back to watch Murray. 

After a long moment, Boz rests his palm on the front of the dresser drawer and slides it closed. Whether he realizes it or not, once the handgun is out of sight, safely resting on the balled up socks, he relaxes and appears to be breathing normally again. Nick breathes again, too. 

He worried about telling Murray the truth, both when Murray finally had to admit to himself that he'd killed an innocent man -- though Nick still thinks to himself that anybody who shot his best friend Cody is NOT an innocent man -- and when he spoke with Murray just a moment ago about the possibility that he might never want to touch a gun again. 

But he has always known, deep down, that his friend Murray is a strong guy, despite his physical size and build, and the last few days have just confirmed what he already knew. 

_All those times that I thought I was protecting him, being so careful about what I said... if I'd only been a little more open, a little more honest, maybe then..._

Murray looks up at him then, and maybe it's only Nick's imagination running away with him, but there's something knowing about the look on Murray's face, as if he's thinking "Protecting me again, Nick Ryder? Watching out that I don't get hurt?" Nick can't tell if Murray would thank him for that, or not. 

Nick opens his mouth to speak, expecting to hear himself say "Come on upstairs, Boz. Cody's waiting for us, let's hit the beach," or something like that. 

"I love you, Murray," he says instead. "I'm sorry it's taken me that long to say that. All the time I've spent trying not to say what I was really thinking --" 

"I know, Nick," Murray says. "I love you, too." 

"No, you don't! Not this way. I do love you like a buddy, Boz. Like a brother, and that's one of the things I should have told you before, so many things, but I love you in another way, too, a kind of love that you don't know about. It's like the kind of love --" 

It feels like a dam of words has broken apart in him, and the words keep pouring out of him as if they'll never stop, but oddly, they stop at the simple motion of Murray holding up his hand for silence, like all the times Nick made Murray stop talking for one reason or another. 

"I do know, Nick," he says, and like all the other signs of his intelligence, this shows up as a light behind his eyes, too, as a brightness there. "And yes, I love you, too. And yes, I know what you mean, about not saying things. There are a lot of things you haven't said over the years. But do you know what? Believe it or not, there are some things that I haven't said over the years, just like you." 

"Murray?" 

"Sit down, Nick," Murray says. "We should talk."


End file.
